Emotional Abuse

It’s abuse… It’s unfair…

You say I say nasty things, but you started it. I’ve had a lifetime of soul destroying pain and misery. You were supposed to be my blanket. My comfort. Instead you destroy me…

I’m confused by the times you’re kind and seem loving.. then wake up when you disrespect me, ignore me and neglect me.

You say I must come to you for comfort. Shouldn’t you just come and comfort me?

I’m confused as to why all this happens to me. I question my purpose. I question my life. I often consider death, but realise I may hurt people I do love, my boys… My cats… What will become of them?

I want to make a success of my venture and leave. Find peace… Even though it hurts inside so deeply to be rejected yet again… To be neglected and carelessly treated like I don’t matter…

Here I am at 3:30 in the morning in the spare bedroom again. Crying. Alone. I’ve been crying all night. At 5:00 I have to bath and get ready for my market… And you will be leaving for the farm and leaving me alone for days on this plot… Not worried about me or cared.

My heart is so broken… I am so sad… And I’m so tired to be this way….

I need rescue…


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